I recently came across a very disheartening incident during a wedding alliance process of one of our readers. In general, the marriage process itself is a very stressful process for all – boy, girl, parents etc. On top of that rejecting a boy or a girl is a tough situation. From time immortal, we are used to telling various reasons for rejecting – “horoscopes didn’t match”, “boy/girl wants to wait for 2 more years” etc…so many reasons that we know that there is a mismatch somewhere and we move on.
In this case, the parent introduced themselves as great Mahaperiyava devotees and Periyava is everything to them etc. In the process, boy met the girl, they liked each other and suddenly the boy’s parent said to girl’s parents that there is a mismatch on living style/status, wealth etc. Didn’t they know about this before they proceeded? I don’t know about how the boy took the whole thing but this young lady is so hurt. It pains me. I know she is a great person – staunch devotee of Periyava.
Come on! Is this what Periyava taught us all? All His life Periyava has been telling us to look into the family values, culture, bride/groom’s compatibility – their character, devotion etc. How come we completely ignore all these? How are these people “devotees” of Periyava? How Periyava is everything to them?! I don’t get it.
Choosing the life partner is a very important process and one has every right to reject a person. All those filtering of social status, wealth etc should happen before even you proceed – not after boy and girl meets and likes each other…We have seen/read so many incidents where millionaires became beggars due to one’s karma. We have also seen Periyava’s blessings alone have made ordinary people so rich and wealthy.
I dont know if those concerned parties read this post. If so, my only request to them is “don’t do this mistake one more time”.
Periyava once said that “if you get dowry, don’t put my name in the invitation”. I guess it needs to be extended to this situation as well…We all are educated and the very reason we are here in this temple is that we are devotees of Periyava. Please take extra caution in dealing in such sensitive matters and make a resolution that nobody’s feelings are going to be hurt in this process. This is the least thing we can do as a devotee. If you can’t do this, stop calling yourselves as Periyava devotee as it would be a great insult to Him.
I am not writing this to create a sympathy wave for her. I am so confident that Periyava will find a wonderful, handsome groom for her. I only want all the parents to behave responsibly. As it comes in Spiderman movie “great power comes with great responsibility”. The moment you call yourself a Periyava devotee, it comes with a great responsibility to live up to that expectation.
Along this same topic, I have been thinking for quite some time to kick-start a way to leverage our user base for exchanging of horoscopes etc and make this process little easier. I intend to implement this soon by partnering with few volunteers who are doing service with HH Balaperiyava…This is only a heads-up…
During this trip, I had a great opportunity spend lot of time with HH Balaperiyava and listened to all His plans for the next generation, protecting our culture, values etc. I will share them all with you soon.
